I woke up to the sounds of "Jhanda Ooncha Rahe Hamara" today morning from the nearby school..and in a flash..all of the memories of this special day that I have nurtured since childhood came alive...and then I was wondering..how my definition of "FREEDOM" has changed over time.
Long back, at kindergarten, "FREEDOM" was something to be celebrated by drawing a tricolor using pastels, and taking it to school, all dressed up for the parade, early in the morning. Of course, I am not forgetting the boondi laddoos, we used to get in return, after listening to hours of patriotic speeches, and songs.
Then came the next stage, when the idea of INDEPENDENCE day started meaning a Holiday. I remember celebrating many such independence days with family, and friends all going to a picninc spot. Of course, the patriotic songs now got replaced with Antakshari, and tambola games.
Growing up further, all my NCERT books taught me the freedom struggle, and the sacrifices people made to make India a free country. Henceforth, I would remember those freedom fighters in great awe, and thank God, that the Britishers have left.
Then there came a time at high school, when I wrote speeches to mark this day. .and then practised for hours in front of the mirror, making sure, I do not mess up, on the D-day. I still remember my trembling feet, when I gave my first Independence Day speech in front of an entire school..my nerves shaking, and my hands wet with sweat, even in the month of August.
By now, I had started appreciating this day, and its significance in the life of Indians..and to me, it meant an occasion that NEEDS to be celebrated...But then my little heart was shattered as I started realising, that in essence to most people, this day does not mean more than a public holiday, a dry day, and a day to savour free laddoos, or a day to make some money by selling tricolors at traffic signals, and that most people even don't realise that this is a special day..Believe me, I was in tears, when I realised the apathy of people towards this day for the first time..even wrote a poem pouring all that I felt on paper..I was probably too shielded from the real world problems to understand that you can't celebrate freedom, when you have needs like food and clothing to worry about..and when you don't know, when you'll be having your next meal, and when you have a leaking roof that needs to be catered more importantly, than celebrating freedom...So freedom loses all meaning without the basic needs being addressed.
We were not a free country in my eyes now.
As time passed by, I found myself guilty of losing my childhood perspective on this subject, and was facing the obvious consequences of growing up, and getting more individualistic at the same time.
For me, 'MY' freedom was precious..freedom to do what I want to do in Life, freedom to skip prayers at home, freedom to go to movies at will...But there was a growing anguish inside...when I started learning, that I can't do all that I want..and that I am bound by the family, and society at large to make sure, my actions do not break their medieval aged rituals, and their hard set of unshakable rules which never made any sense to me...
Neither India was free, nor I was.
And then it was the last weekend I finished reading A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini. Set in the backdrop of Afghanistan, the novel is a devastating tale of two women who endure the unendurable at each and every step in their lives..You start reading the book, and a lump starts growing in your throat..and just when you start thinking..nothing worse can happen..you are thrown into the next piece of wreckage.Even the basic human rights were denied to these women under the Taliban regime.The atrocities that they tolerated during that time are enough to make your hair raised at ends..
Turning every fresh page made me realize how much more FREE I am..how much more blessed I am..and the almost dead, hopeless freedom suddenly got resurrected with a new, fresh face.
Happy Independence Day!!
